My old friend got pregnant, and her family is so fundamentally religious that they accepted her story that it was a virgin pregnancy rather than let themselves believe she had //whispers// relations.
When I heard she was pregnant, I flew to Mexico to help with the preparations. I told her I knew the truth, and she started crying and told me she had no idea who the father was, because she didn’t remember.
Anyway, at one point I went to the theatre to see Suicide Squad and Jared Leto was there in full Joker costume creeping people out by sitting behind them and blowing on their necks whenever he came on screen.
When he did it to me, I turned around and just said “Leah’s pregnant.” and he turned white. I mean, you could see him go pale from underneath his makeup. He looked stricken. Then he just said, “thanks.” in a quiet voice, and got up and left.
I went back home without seeing Leah again, but she called me right before i woke up, crying, saying her family had disowned her because she was having the baby of an actor.
Fuck I forgot to read the url and I thought this was someone’s actual life event or some shit
me walking into the animal shelter: hi id like the stupidest cat you have
sometimes my cat won’t eat her dinner so i thought i was tricking her into eating by putting a few treats on it but she’s actually tricked me into feeding her treats and i want a stupider cat
